Since we started our ministry dontperish.com, we have received many phone calls and emails from people either doing what we call 'drive by emails' which means they have no biblical backing to their false claims about us and they shoot an email then run off into the dark, or we get people who 'seem' like they might be seeking the truth. We say 'seem' because their original emails/phone calls certainly sound like they want truth but quite often they too run off and we never hear from them. Within all this contact we get at least half if not more from women. Some of those women do not have professed believing husbands but quite often many do. This article is written for the godly women who have been made a new creation in Christ (2 Corinthians 5:17) and are walking in obedience to His Word (or willing to when they learn) and they have husbands who profess to be a believer.
We will preface this article with the fact that although it is written for women; professed believing men are a major part of the problem. This is one of the (many) reasons we stand against denominational religion as they don't teach men to be leaders but to sit in an unbiblical pew week after week. God's Word says men are to be the authority and leader in the home and a true godly, born from above man, (John 3:3) will be doing what he can to be the leader/spiritual head of the home. If men were stepping up into the headship position that God appointed then women would not have a reason to be looking elsewhere for guidance. (This doesn't mean disobedient women won't look elsewhere, it means the 'reason' for them doing so would be taken away.) This in no way condones a godly woman out on the world wide web seeking through various ministries trying to find truth as God's Word says (1 John 2:27) we need no man to teach us and James 1:5 says if we ask for wisdom God will grant it to us as long as we ask without doubting. We are also shown in 2 Timothy 3:6 that women will be deceived even in their own homes which is what we see going on through the media (TV, Radio and internet). This is exactly why we are going to God's Word to see what He says about this situation.
We see the role of women in the scriptures, it is one of submission and obedience to husbands (click HERE to read an article about biblical submission), about stripping themselves down from inside to outside (See an article HERE about how godly women are to dress and HERE how women are to cover their heads) being silent and not taking authority of men in the body (1 Timothy 2, 1Peter 3, 1 Corinthians 14 see the article HERE) and being a keeper of the home (see and article HERE for that.) These instructions for women (among many more) show the place and nature of a godly woman in obedience to God's Word. We draw this picture so wives might understand better why they are to 'ask their husbands at home'.
In 1 Corinthians 14:34-35 we see the character and nature of the body when it gathers and inside that we see instructions for women:
When women contact us without involving their believing husbands, they are sinning. WARNING! There are so very few ministries out in the media that teach the full truth and obedience to God's Word and how can an undiscerning woman discern what is truth and what is not? God's Word teaches (many times) that women will be deceived!
We will preface this article with the fact that although it is written for women; professed believing men are a major part of the problem. This is one of the (many) reasons we stand against denominational religion as they don't teach men to be leaders but to sit in an unbiblical pew week after week. God's Word says men are to be the authority and leader in the home and a true godly, born from above man, (John 3:3) will be doing what he can to be the leader/spiritual head of the home. If men were stepping up into the headship position that God appointed then women would not have a reason to be looking elsewhere for guidance. (This doesn't mean disobedient women won't look elsewhere, it means the 'reason' for them doing so would be taken away.) This in no way condones a godly woman out on the world wide web seeking through various ministries trying to find truth as God's Word says (1 John 2:27) we need no man to teach us and James 1:5 says if we ask for wisdom God will grant it to us as long as we ask without doubting. We are also shown in 2 Timothy 3:6 that women will be deceived even in their own homes which is what we see going on through the media (TV, Radio and internet). This is exactly why we are going to God's Word to see what He says about this situation.
We see the role of women in the scriptures, it is one of submission and obedience to husbands (click HERE to read an article about biblical submission), about stripping themselves down from inside to outside (See an article HERE about how godly women are to dress and HERE how women are to cover their heads) being silent and not taking authority of men in the body (1 Timothy 2, 1Peter 3, 1 Corinthians 14 see the article HERE) and being a keeper of the home (see and article HERE for that.) These instructions for women (among many more) show the place and nature of a godly woman in obedience to God's Word. We draw this picture so wives might understand better why they are to 'ask their husbands at home'.
In 1 Corinthians 14:34-35 we see the character and nature of the body when it gathers and inside that we see instructions for women:
Let your women keep silence in the churches: for it is not permitted unto them to speak; but they are commanded to be under obedience as also saith the law.
And if they will learn any thing, let them ask their husbands at home: for it is a shame for women to speak in the church.
God has designed a beautiful plan and that is to work through the male leadership both in the body and the home. This means male leadership is for all things, all times; not just for believing husbands or when women deem it something they will give over to the men and not just when a woman thinks a man deserves it. Ephesians 5:22-24
Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.
("All things" does not refer to sin see Acts 5:29 but it does mean in all other things of life.)
God's plan is for Him to work through the male leadership and for women to be their helpers (Genesis 3) and to be quiet and submissive in order to help the men become the leaders God wants them to be. What does this mean to a woman whose husband professes to be a believer but is not obedient to the Word? The same thing applies, she is to follow God's Word in all things by being obedient to him, submitting to him and deferring to him in all things. By doing this and following God's Word, we will see how an obedient woman may win a man without a word (1 Peter 3), or heap coals on his head and hopefully bring conviction that will lead to repentance then leadership in the home!
In God's Word we see how His ways are not our ways and He most definitely could us a woman to confound a man: But God hath chosen the foolish things of the world to confound the wise; and God hath chosen the weak things of the world to confound the things which are mighty (1 Corinthians 1:27)
This is not to say women are of lesser value or foolish but we do see in 1 Peter 3:7 that the wives are the weaker vessel and so be it when a man should be the leader but isn't so God uses the weaker vessel (wife) to bring conviction to a man who is supposed to be (and probably thinks he is) the leader. It was just recently that feminism rose and women stepped out from their role and took leadership from men. Men turned it over to them (fault on both sides) so godly men and women need to work hard to reverse the roles to be obedient to God's Word. That can take a long time because if a man has been a slacking for however long and the woman does not respect him (sin on both their parts) and because women do not submit/respect their husbands the husbands stop trying to lead as they are tired of having to deal with the contentious wife.
A continual dropping in a very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike. (Proverbs 27:15)
When we receive emails from women we always ask if they have a believing husband and if so, please bring him into the conversation and have him contact us. We see quite often that the women are out on the internet getting swept away with this doctrine and that, while trying to drag their husbands along (which is sin on both her part for doing so and his part for following her like Adam did with Eve). At some point the husbands give up and the woman is out running around by herself. (Sin on both the husband and wife again.) God's Word has an order for that situation, wives ask your husbands at home.
If a wife asks her husband a spiritual question and he has no answer (or doesn't care to look into it) and she continues to ask every question she has, at some point he will either get mad and tell her to stop asking (which shows evidence of unregeneration) or he will have coals heaped on his head that he doesn't know anything and should begin to seek. If she's obedient he may actually gain trust in her that she truly is learning submission and wanting to have him lead and therefore encourage him to step up into the leadership role.
When women contact us without involving their believing husbands, they are sinning. WARNING! There are so very few ministries out in the media that teach the full truth and obedience to God's Word and how can an undiscerning woman discern what is truth and what is not? God's Word teaches (many times) that women will be deceived!
Wives, if your husband professes to be a believer and is not obediently following God's Word, you have a big job ahead of you killing your flesh in your new quiet, submissive, obedient nature. This starts in the small things in every aspect of our lives. Sadly most of the women we speak to are already showing the fruit of being leaders of their homes because they are not obediently asking their husbands and they are the epitomy of 2 Timothy 3:6-7 For of this sort are they which creep into houses, and lead captive silly women laden with sins, led away with divers lusts, Ever learning, and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth.
Many believers are programmed from man made religion that they 'must' follow someone or some organization but if we were to truly trust God's Word, we would see it is sufficient. Of course if you have a Christian marriage, or true godly/obedient brothers and sisters, you would come together with them but if you don't have them...God's Word is sufficient as it states: All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness: That the man of God may be perfect, thoroughly furnished unto all good works.
(2 Timothy 3:16-17)
(2 Timothy 3:16-17)
Godly women, if you are reading this and are looking for deeper study in God's Word seek the guidance of the Holy Spirit, trust that God is watching over you, get a greek and hebrew lexicon and go into deep study of the scriptures. We are here to help if your husband decides he wants to bring his household together with us and we would encourage you both in the Word of God.
Now, what should a woman do if her husband truly does repent and steps into his role of spiritual leadership in the home but he is not at the place where his wife is in knowledge etc? (In the situation that they don't have a body of believers to turn to.)
She should continue to do as God's Word instructs and ask her husband questions and they can then both look into it together. She is to follow his lead, at his pace and go with him until he gains in his knowledge. If she leads him and teaches him everything she knows and shows him all there is that she can see in the Word, does all the research etc...once again the woman is leading and the man is following. Is this God's order? God will honor the woman who stands at the side of a godly man that is striving in knowledge and obedience and learns how to bring up subjects that she knows, in a mild, quiet way and then backs off. This will teach her submission and allow the husband to grow through Christ into the leader he should be and into the ministry God gives him, not what his wife thinks he should be doing. Wives be patient while your husband grows.
On the other hand, If godly husband and wife have a body of true believers then the husband should be going to the other men in the body for teaching: But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence. (1 Timothy 2:12)
Why?
For Adam was first formed, then Eve.
Wives, ask your husbands at home, be submissive in all things (except sin) surrender your feminism (even if you don't think you have any) and become that chaste, meek, quiet, shamefaced, gentle, humble woman of God.
God be praised!
www.dontperish.com
She should continue to do as God's Word instructs and ask her husband questions and they can then both look into it together. She is to follow his lead, at his pace and go with him until he gains in his knowledge. If she leads him and teaches him everything she knows and shows him all there is that she can see in the Word, does all the research etc...once again the woman is leading and the man is following. Is this God's order? God will honor the woman who stands at the side of a godly man that is striving in knowledge and obedience and learns how to bring up subjects that she knows, in a mild, quiet way and then backs off. This will teach her submission and allow the husband to grow through Christ into the leader he should be and into the ministry God gives him, not what his wife thinks he should be doing. Wives be patient while your husband grows.
On the other hand, If godly husband and wife have a body of true believers then the husband should be going to the other men in the body for teaching: But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence. (1 Timothy 2:12)
Why?
For Adam was first formed, then Eve.
And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression. (1 Timothy 2:13-14)
This is a serious matter! It is a very fine line how much a woman can teach her husband in the Word, God has set his authority order in place and for husbands and wives not to submit to it is sinful. Wives, ask your husbands at home, be submissive in all things (except sin) surrender your feminism (even if you don't think you have any) and become that chaste, meek, quiet, shamefaced, gentle, humble woman of God.
Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths. (Proverbs 3:5-6)
The silence of a woman, can speak volumes.
Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives;
While they behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear. Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price.
For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands: Even as Sara obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye are, as long as ye do well, and are not afraid with any amazement.
(1 Peter 3:1-6)
God be praised!
www.dontperish.com